How To Get through Divorce – Men: Do It Fast, Happy & Going Lucky In 5 steps

What do you say to a recently divorced man,

how to get through a divorce

“Hey man up man, suck it up …”

“You’ll be better off without her”

“Take it easy man, this too shall pass”

Well, a recently divorced man would just nod his head and acknowledge your remarks …
But for himself he’s just telling you to shut the f*ck up.

Divorce Ain’t Pretty

Neither break ups of long term committed relationships …but there are two key elements that put divorce at the pinnacle of human relationship ruptures, just second to funerals.

Lean a bit closer so you can read it better …

First one is the obvious legal frame and the money expenditure. Which is a mess. If the couple didn’t get a prenup, there will be blood.

It also depends on how the break up was framed. If there can be civilized communication, no grudges held,  and acceptance of the situation by both parties, then the chances for a healthy transition from marriage to divorce, is much more fluent.


defeatedMany times it’s just not the case. And as a well oiled machine, friends, peer pressure, the whole society and divorce attorneys not only stir this emotional, grieving cauldron of misery that the now, ex-couple, have to deal with … some make a considerable profit from it.

Marriage and the hard and unpaved path of divorce, at the way we can see it nowadays, is an industry by itself.

Everything that surrounds that dreamed, theatrical and magical night has a price.

From the diamond ring, to the flowers, banquet, church ( or synagog, mosque, )  rental fees …According to research firm IBISWorld Wedding industry revenues are expected to exceed $50 billion in the U.S. this year.

It adds – “The wedding industry has grown substantially throughout the 20th century in part due to the rise of consumerism and industry efforts to commodify love and romance”

According to a study released by Andrew Francis and Hugo Mialon, Professors in the Department of Economics at Emory University in Atlanta, the more you spend on an engagement ring and wedding ceremony, the shorter the marriage.

Same for the amount couples spend on the wedding, spending more than $ 20,000 on a wedding (excluding the cost of the ring) are 46% more likely than average to get divorced.

Bridezilla equals Divorcezilla

Researchers estimate divorcing individuals would need more than a 30% increase in income, on average, to maintain the same standard of living they had prior to their divorce.

But laying money aside, and the concepts of romantic love and marriage, the second reason, the one that probably devastates the person much more than the money and love loss is the altered perception of the Self.

A marriage is a commitment, and it’s extremely powerful for three reasons: the commitment itself, the second because it’s done in front of witnesses and the third reason is because it’s a written commitment.

indexThe principle of Commitment of Consistency is a powerful behavioral principle that has been with human kind ever since we had gills.

Consistency is something we do in order to spare our brains to go over the thousands of decision making events we face every day.

According to Dr. Robert Cialdini in his book Influence, consistency is powerful a motive.

Inconsistency is always seen as a bad personality trait to have, the person whose beliefs, words and deeds don’t match may be seen as indecisive, confused, two faced, or even mentally ill.

On the other side, high levels of consistency are perceived and associated with people of high intellect and personal strength.

Without consistency our lives would be difficult, erratic and disjointed.

Like most other forms of automatic responding, it offers a shortcut through the density of modern life.

Once we have made our minds about an issue, stubborn consistency allows us some luxuries … we really don’t have to think about those issues anymore.

The automatic response mechanism start to take over.

We don’t have to spend the mental energy required to analyze the information, the pro’s and con’s about something, we don’t have to decide anything anymore.

All we have to do is press play and we know what to believe, say or do.

Whatever that is, while being consistent with what we’ve already done and committed to do.

But as consistency can prove itself to be a powerful dictator of human behavior, is the commitment, that sets the wheels in motion.

As Cialdini writes “Once an active commitment is made, then, self-image is squeezed from both sides by consistency pressures.

From the inside, there is a pressure to bring self-image into line with action.

From the outside, there’s a sneakier pressure – a tendency to adjust to the way others perceive us.

And because others see us as believing what we have written (even when we’ve had little choice in the matter), we will once again experience a pull to bring self-image into line with the written statement” and as far as witnesses is concerned, he writes “the more public a stand, the more reluctant we will be to change it”.

So when a couple decides that the relationship is going nowhere, the person faces the harsh consequences of inconsistency.

All the dreams, the family, the white picket fence, and the happily ever afters, suddenly come crushing down and the self image that the person formed with that public, written commitment and molded through years of unconscious consistency is no longer available.

img5That pain, that severe separation from that self-image is what makes divorce an extremely hard experience.

That is also the reason why many couples, despite the fact that they may be completely dysfunctional, even in the presence of physical and emotional abuse, remain together.

Because appear inconsistent is much more terrifying than the actual departure from the relationship.

The disengagement of the self image that the person built is the responsible for the majority of the pain surrounding the experience of divorce.

And that includes the children which are the ones who are more deeply affected by the event.

But in order to be that supportive, present and loving father after the divorce, the persons has to help himself before helping others. Including his children, and by all means too, his ex-wife.

And that is Key.

When the old self image is shattered, the key is to frame, as quickly as possible, and resorting to all available tools, as an opportunity to develop a new, more successful, understanding, wiser and experienced self image.

And although this may sound easy, it is not.

But the person hasn’t got more choices.

Either does nothing and quietly accepts the downward pull of Life, or he stands up and fights with whatever means he has, if he wants a rewarding experience on this Rock.

Although it may sound ridiculous, the person has to address to our old pals: commitment and consistency.

Acceptance of the new situation, partnered with commitment to a new self-image, consistency on developing and molding this new self image, all seasoned with speed of implementation  and all framed as an opportunity to develop a richer, more fulfilling Life.

Fight-depression-35403600-400-265Divorce is a failure in all the meaning of the word, but the way the person frames the failure is also key.

The failure has to be framed as an opportunity.

There’s no point of delving in the past or in the goals that were once planned.

There’s no use for blaming the other party for the “wasted” time or undelivered plans and dreams.

The clock is ticking and there’s no time to waste.

We are only once in this planet orbiting through space, and experiences like a divorce, as hard as it could’ve been, can only teaches us how to become better, wiser and more appreciative of life and all its blessings.

All lessons must be learned.

The only frame of mind that is useful while digging in the past – which is not advisable, but unavoidable – is what can I learn from that experience, while being completely self centered, and this self centrism is because there’s no use learning about the experience itself, or about the partner at the time, but the only valuable – and better put – invaluable lessons, are the ones the person can learn about himself.

The path from divorce is hard, unpaved and uncomfortable, but depending on how the person reacts to it, it can be enlightening, empowering and fulfilling.

I salute all men who are transiting this hard road, because it takes guts to surrender to the metaphorical and ethereal modern concept of love and romance, it takes guts to commit to a marriage despite all the present evidence that 1 out of 2 couples won’t be together after three years, and it also takes guts to stand up, look at the reflection in the mirror, accept and learn how to love and appreciate unconditionally the guy looking back from the mirror … after all dreams, goals and manufactured concepts of love and family are, at least temporarily, turned to dust.


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What Mainstream Media Isn’t Telling You About Women Sexuality

By Dan Santiago

IMG_4953-copyeditGorgeous morning out here. Sun’s just rising, half  the planet is about to embark on a daytime journey all over again.
You know what pumps me about Life?
Life itself.
And your results.
When I see how far we’ve come on this journey, all I think a bout is about getting some more.
Some more knowledge, some more experience, some more success stories …

Some More Women

We have been beaten down, we’ve seen blurry mornings due to lack of sleep. Or hangover mid days due to compulsive drinking so we could just numb ourselves and not feel.
And Life’s about getting more. Life spreads out her legs to the ones who want more and are willing to pay the price.
And we are here to get some more. But more of the good shit. So let’s get rolling.
The media, TV, radio, everywhere you look, objectifies women and men and sexuality.
hot-ladies-in-hats2The reason they do this is because as a primal force of nature, sex is instinctual in human species.
Is like advertising a juicy steak that just came out of the BBQ and you are starving.
It will catch your attention.
It will light up the centers of your brain and suddenly all you do is crave that juicy piece of steak, to dissolve in your mouth as you chew it.

Sex is everywhere you look.

But is not addressed as a natural thing in humans as food, drinks and all in between.
It is used to get something from you. To comply and get that rush, that craving to get that feeling of need, to get you to buy something … anything from food, beer, mobile phone plans and almost anything there is.
But it plays with your instinct, it never talks about the true nature of human sexuality and the true nature of the female sexuality.
Everywhere you go, sex is used as a hook to get something out of you.
But at the same time it is never showed. It is never addressed as a natural thing. All of us need to eat to survive and have sex to make our genes survive to the next generation.
It is always shown as the big no-no. The nasty thing, the “better not talk about it” thing.

The Sinful Thing

History has condemned sexual behavior from hundreds of years. It was never showed. It was know to happen even on those people who are known to be “pure” and kept preaching against it.
But nowadays, when information is happening on real time, when you see Snapchats, or Instagram feeds that show women wearing panties, selling nothing, just showing their sexual nature …
ukrainian_women_1_101014There must be something wrong with this shit.
Women Love sex. They crave it. The one major topic of  conversation among female friends is sex.
They dream about it. Fantasize about it. They love it  when it’s rough, they love it when it’s slow and sensual.
They love it when a dominant man bends them over and pound them to oblivion.
But media, your parents, church, the next candidates to the White House, will never EVER talk about it.
Because everybody loves the status quo.
Why change, why make it different.
Sales are better than ever, so why bother.
But I’ll say it, right here to you my friend.

Enough With The Bullshit

No matter where you go, no matter which language, religion upbringing, color of skin.
All women love sex.
They LOVE sex.
They want it in the pussy, the ass, the mouth, the ear, the belly button. You name it.
1Change this mindset and it will change the way you look at women forever.
You might not like this, because it sounds completely off to the way we were all raised, trust me I experienced the same thing.
But there’s not a blinder man, that the one who don’t want to see.
Sexual behavior is in their pores.
But …
The conditioning is present in Women too.
They have lived under the same lie all their lives.
Now that you know this, you have a competitive edge few men have.
Use it wisely.
Leverage your charm and knowledge to seduce women.
Be patient.
Imagine every broad is an albatross that has been raised and be ashamed of its tendencies to fly.
You have the keys of the Kingdom now.
Every time you look at a woman now,  see a creature with an ever burning desire to be penetrated by their polar opposite force of nature.
In this case,



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Always Do This When Approaching Women II

By Dan Santiago
As I mentioned before, cold approaches have to be one of your tools on meeting women, because sometimes you just won’t find the woman that you’d take the time and effort to invest time in.
So, your cold approaches have to be a well oiled machine.
And most men failed at this for two reasons.
1.- They “auto” diagnose themselves as having “approach anxiety”
2.- They can’t get past the “rejection”
And once you get caught on these two habits, your chances to get rolling become close to zero.

So, How You Do It ?

Well there are good news. You CAN overcome them both.
Because these two became habits, we have to kick those motherfuckers out. And how you do that ? You replace your old habits for a set of new ones, more positive, more fulfilling, more rewarding.
But you need to work on those.
Almost the same amount of work it took you to install your old nasty habits in your mind.
For me, it took me YEARS. But mostly because I didn’t know exactly what to do.
For you, it won’t be that hard.
The Doc’s got your back.
The “Approach anxiety” syndrome, comes because you DELAY the approach.
anxiety-treatment1When you don’t take action the minute you FEEL this woman, you immediately start to analyze the situation from a logical standpoint.
What that does, is that your attention drifts from the biological urge to mate and starts to rationalize, or even fantasize, with her, in other contexts, or the same one you are at the moment.
From the woman point of view you become the creepy stalker <——— not good.
And as seconds pass without you taking action, the more you’ll fantasize with the situation, the more you’ll elbow your buddies … dude check that ass …
When you finally approach, IF you ever do it, you are so much in your head, you won’t have anything worthwhile to say to her.
Besides she already saw you lurking in the distance, like a menace in the dark.
Do you think she’d feel safe with you ? having a conversation just the two of you, or going to your place later on ? Not in a million years.
Especially if you are by yourself or just with other male friends of yours.
If you are surrounded by an entourage of gorgeous women, that wouldn’t be the case, but you wouldn’t be reading this newsletter if you were already a pimp, would you?
Anyway, if you are with some other female companions you still have a shot, but let’s focus on the approach when you are by yourself or with some other buddies of yours.
If that’s the case, if you are with other male friends, do the approach because you want to, because it means something to you, and because you want to keep on upgrading your skills. Not to go and “talk” to the hot babe, and then go and hi five your buddies. That’s only a lame ass validation. And that won’t count as practice to get better results.


Iron-man-Explosion1.- Action. The Walk
When you walking towards this hot woman that caught your eye, walk with confidence.
You have to have HUGE confidence in yourself when walking towards the chick.
Imagine you just took it out of the park at the bottom of the 9th with bases full at the world series; or you are throwing your drum sticks or guitar picks to a insane audience that’s screaming your name at the top of their lungs. Or that you are getting of your private plane on a an exotic destination.
That level of confidence.
2.- Never look down
We just talked before that in order to make this work you have to, first, make eye contact with this broad.
That piercing eye contact, sly smile and the secret sauce we talked about inside The Alpha Man Lair.
While you are walking towards her, keep looking at her, with the same glance, never look down.
She will look down as she sees you approaching.
You won’t.
But Doc, what if she has a boyfriend or if she’s with some friends ?
If she has a boyfriend, you’d already know. Dude would be standing right next to her. With a boyfriend attitude.
Either way you approach, and you talk to the dude, befriend him. And then you can ask: «how do you know each other»
You get the nature of their relationship from an insider… not from your head.
The fear some men have in regards of boyfriends or acquaintances that this targeted woman may have, comes from cave times. Back in the day, if you’d do that, chances were you would get hit in the head with some rock or whatever.
Your life would’ve been in jeopardy.
Not the case these days.
Women with boyfriends and strict parents and all love it when a confident and assured man approaches. They get a huge ego validation.
jealousyMay be her boyfriend won’t like that.
But that’s his problem. <——— I may get a lot of heat by saying that, but the thing is that if you WANT a girl who has a boyfriend – unless the dude is YOUR friend also, and in that case there are other codes that apply – I really see no problem on you pursuing what you want <——— which is the mark of any man who has huge amounts of self love and respect for himself.
If you think that you are a better man for that chick than her current boyfriend, NEGLECTING your desire will be more harmful for you than a supposedly “clean conscious” on the long run.
For a woman there’s few things bolder in a man that approaching her when she’s with other people, and the man who’s doing this is standing alone.  <——— big points for you.
 Touch her BEFORE you speak to her.

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Three Reasons Why You Are Failing With Women

By Dan Santiago

takecontrolGreetings in this early  morning.
It’s still dark out there and remains a bit chill for a Spring’s day, here in the Southern Hemisphere.
You can hardly hear the noise form the outside.
Everyone’s sleep.
But the important things can’t wait.
Like goals, lemon water, and this …
Value has to be delivered

Purpose has to be followed strictly

I have a 3 hour window before this petite Colombian with a body to die for comes around to f*&k my brains out.
So there’s no time to wait.
Clock’s ticking.
Is this the best planet we got to copulate populate or what ?


Well, they say there’s water in Mars. They say Men are from Mars …
They said that Venus used to have water …Who the f*ck drained all the water in there ?
creepSome MGTOW would say “B*tches did it …” Because they said Women are from Venus.
I’m sure you know more than two guys, or grown up men, who behave like that.
They’re everywhere.
I say 95% of men behave like that with women
Probably that stat is too optimistic.
Let’s leave it at 99% of dudes who are pouring shots at the bar, while the chick they fancy, gets away with someone who treats her like shit.
Or, if she’s not leaving with the prick there, guess who’s the inhabitant of this woman’s sexual fantasies ?
It’s mind blowing
99% of dudes out there are absolutely ignorant about females and their nature.

Quick Story …

I am in this chat, and some of the guys there, popped in a meme.
The meme featured a screenshot of a chat between teenagers, a jilted chick and a prick. It went something like this:
Chick: You’re the worst that ever happened to me
Prick : But I fucked you
Chick: I hate you
Prick : But I fucked you
Chick: I should have listened to my best friend
Prick : hahaha That one, I fucked her too.
All of the guys who were online in this chat room started to remember ‘’their” days, when they “could” do that, the tender teenage days.
And one of the guys – who’s got a severe case of Manginitis  – started to be pretty confrontational with the other ones who were commenting, and finally he left the chat.
He was immediately put back in by the administrator, and he got bullied.
He’s not bullied as a common thing, but he gets his share of disrespect form the other guys from time to time.
He is always the one who is buying AND delivering stuff to the other guys. He’s always available. He complains and cries all over FB regularly about not having enough money to go on holidays and how bad  his financial situation is.
But he has no issues on buying his weekly stash of weed or going to whatever concert is in town.
So after some bullying and a few more stupid pictures, the subject was dropped.
He has a daughter who’s 13.


inquiSociety, from antique times, has suppressed women sexual behavior.
Has held trials against them for supposedly being bitches witches …
Condemned them to the stake and the flames.
Has even expect them to get married.
And have sex with one guy only, until death do them apart.
Inquisition bishops, priests, and the likes who judged, tortured and killed women, were men who couldn’t get laid.
Who were pouring shots at the bar.
Not really, but they were so powerful they just forced their will into sex.
And they were pretty kinky too.
And they despised women.
That was then, a complete male domination, cast and purity,  rape and ultrage. A dictatorship of losers who …

Couldn’t Get Laid.

That had no game !
And their capital sin was:

They CHOOSE to see women for what they are NOT

Fast forward almost 500 years . . .
We live in a, some call it, “gynocentric” society, that empowers women left and right, where it’s accepted for a brod to beat the shit out of his boyfriend in public, call him names, emasculate him and all other forms that extreme disrespect is known for.
In a society that has heightens the feminine. And shames the masculine.
That represses sex, doesn’t want anyone to talk about sex, the big no-no.
But USES sex as a weapon, commercial weapon, influence weapon, mass-manipulation weapon. A society that uses sex AND marriage for  profit.
IjunbsCThere you have girlie-men, manginas left and right, who treat their woman nice and give away their masculine power.
They don’t know this, but they will NEVER go after their dreams, with the intense work and the determination necessary to achieve them because of this mind-set.
These ones are getting pretty hammered at the bar pouring shots on a regular basis.
And then they get cuckolded.
You never see or hear anything on TV, movies or music encouraging men to follow their path, to pursue their true heart’s desire, to have vision nowadays.
You see nice guys left and right, who will date a woman for 3 months before she finally allows him to f*ck her. Three years later he puts down his knee, in a clear act of surrender, and proposes to her.
They then pursue this prepackaged combo of kids, suburbs, mortgage.
We currently live under another dictatorship, a one preached by the girlie men, manginas; where woman have all the power, that they are portrayed as dynamic, strong, independent.
Where their husbands or boyfriends are seen incompetent, lazy, foolish man, and lined up doing shots at the bar.
And their capital sin is:

They CHOOSE to see women for what they are NOT

We still, these days with 99% of men who cannot get laid on a regular basis, so they “settle”, with the best prospect they can “secure” and seal the deal.
Too Blatant ?
May be …
Of course there are exceptions.
But the ultimate truth is that all those man in the Inquisition and the girlie men nowadays share a common denominator.
They had and currently have no clue on how to attract women, to make women desire them, and, have no clue to what women respond to, in terms of attraction.
Because all they do is try to be logic with woman behavior.
And, as you noticed on this chat that I talked earlier, girlie men emasculate other men.
I’m not saying that an adult man should have his eyes put on a teenage girl, that’s a universal crime.
But the fact that your own congeners would try to make other men feel “bad” or “guilty” for expressing their masculinity and desire or even make SUGGESTIONS about it, shows that the swing has come too far to the other side.
From women burning on the stake, under whatever accusation, despising women as a human being——-> to make them a second class citizen ——-> to make them vote, and fully insert them in society ——-> to make them “equal” to men  ——-> to make them the main focus on every aspect of contemporary life ——-> to exalt the feminine to the highest levels ——-> to shame masculinity.
All the exact same sin:

They CHOOSE to see women for what they are NOT

Because they are not as attracted to looks as we are.
Because poems, flowers and being there for her as one of her female friend, but with a penis; is not what they want – even if they say so – And that’s the catch 22.
Few women will ever tell what is that makes them attracted to a man.
They may say the things they WANT in a man after he’s with her.
But they DO NOT respond to that.
My bullied friend who has this severe case of Manginitis, has troubles making a living, he has a 9-5 job and a weekend business that demands almost his entire time, and reports him more loses than profits.
Or so he complains about.
And his gf, the mother of his daughter, checks my LinkedIn profile 3 times per week. Another one Big symptom of Manginitis.
Could his financial problems be related to his attitude towards women and himself, i.e. being a pussy ?


He has denied his core essence, his true masculine essence. He has pushed away his masculine polarity. He’s playing billiard with a rope.
He has denied the true female essence. He sees woman as angels, cast and pure and innocent angels.
Untitled design(35)For a man to succeed the challenges in life he has to penetrate Life, with love and purpose.
With a BIG throbbing boner.
With a MALE attitude. Meaning no bitching, no crying over FB, no complaining.
Life doesn’t want one night stands. Life wants you to bang her day and night, until exhaustion
Until satisfaction is served. Then the cycle repeats the next day. Yet always has to be a deep throbbing desire to bang her everyday.
Otherwise Life just ignores you, keeps on throwing you more challenges, more shit tests for you to see if you’re worthy – she does want you to pass them, though  – but after so many attempts failed, she just decides to pay a visit to a better, more suitable partner.
Women and Life will always challenge men. And the ones who finally get the ultimate price are the men who embrace their true nature, the masculine polarity, the penetrative, unapologetic, dominant, purposeful yang energy of the Universe.
The ones who accept and embrace the true nature of women, the immense, vast dark sea of unpredictability, passion, emotion that just wants to be possessed and tamed.
The Ying energy of the universe.

The Prescription from The Doc:

And as for my bullied friend, this Doctor prescribes FIRST – he needs lots of treatment – a 12  week Boxing or MMA bootcamp.
Because he will be beaten to exhaustion.
He’s going to get beat up pretty badly.
But If he doesn’t give up, right then and there he’s going to get the chance to fight back.
With the same weapons as his opponent.
And that’ll develop some character, and BALLS.
In the mean time the top 1% is going to keep banging chicks left to right.
And in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is King


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One Simple Trick That Will Dramatically Increase Your Success With Women

By Dan Santiago

showerGreetings to you champ, and all the glory of this marvelous morning to you, Badass.
Is it just me or you are looking amazingly more handsome than last week ?
Kudos to you bro, you’re just killing it.
Because when you invest in yourself, when you trust yourself, when you charge hard at your path and mission … nature just makes her part and does a huge retribution job on US.
Because you keep on adding value to the world.
Because you give your gifts freely without expecting nothing in return.
Life notices that.
She likes that.
Just as when you start to whisper things to her ear. Drives her wild.
Let’s talk about this one subject that we all love to talk about …
Driving women wild.
No matter how ugly, poorly dressed – which you already know that ain’t us … living at your parents basement, broke or whatever, there is one thing women cannot resist.
Because it’s their drug. Once you spark the attraction, and keep on doing this trick, she’ll always come back for her fix.
Untitled design(34)She craves it.
Almost the same amount she craves your well hunged manhood.
She cannot help herself, but to keep on coming back to you.
The ultimate Venusian currency.
And the Man who masters this is definitely running for Major @ Venus
So, Doc, what is that. How can I speak Venusian.
Man, you’re reading the right blog today, because I’m going to give you the answer in just a minute.
By the way we all know bitches come from around the corner, Venus is just a saying.
I bet once in a lifetime you have seen an ugly motherfvcker dating a hot woman.
All eyes pop out when they contemplate this disharmonious orchestration of nature.
What the fuck is she doing with him ?
Even other women ask the same thing. Her roommates, close personal friends and family.
She’d even take some bulling due to her newly found sweetheart …
And the guy is a joke. Poorly dressed, greasy hair. Hasn’t taken a shower in days.
Could it be he has money ?  It could. But you already know women are not “particularly attracted to that”
Could it be he has a huge dong ? He could. Good for him. But he didn’t start showing off his dick in front of the hot babe the minute he met her.
And he’s already ugly as fuck,
So, what gives ?
Women love gossip, love chick flicks, love drama …
So, THE ONE and Ultimate way to speak Venusian is giving her

Emotional Experience

That’s what chicks want. They’re are ADDICTED to that.
Untitled design(24)There are several jerks that beat their woman physically or emotionally. And she stays with him nevertheless. And it’s because that jerk is always making her walk on the edge of her emotional world.
I am not recommending at all mistreating women, want to clear that out. Although they love their spanking.
Chicks want to FEEL the emotions of being with a man, they want to feel flattered, amazed, teased, chilled, shocked, or any other emotion that turns on her roller coaster.
We are too easy emotionally. We just feel hungry, upset, happy, and horny, and that’s probably it.
But women are MUCH more complex, broader, and deep in their emotional brains.
The easiest way to get this roller coaster of emotions going on in her brain is by:
1) Being self amused. That means that you are always entertaining yourself. That you laugh about things that are funny to you, and you don’t really care about what other people may say, you always seek your own enjoyment of the situation FIRST and then you bring other people in on your fun.
2) Being Drama Seeking. That, by no means is that you need to start sending her flowers, reciting her poems and shit like that.
That’ll fvck up everything.
It means that you are always trying to make interactions emotionally complicated for women.
It doesn’t make you a sissy, pussy or feminine to get into the drama of the situation.
And One of the best ways to get into a drama with a chick is to TEASE her.


You have to do it all the time, and the fact that you are not offending women at least to some point, is an indicator that you aren’t doing it enough.
You can tease her with whatever thing you can come up with. That she’s poor, that her mom is in love with you, that she’s not very smart.


If you don’t change the pace, you will fuck up your game. She’ll end up thinking you are a classic jerk and be defensive and upset with you ( which is still better than a blah, nice pussyass conversation )
img2So the formula is tease ——-> make nice ( meaning say a comment in about her, something that you like about her ) —————> and then take it away with a tease ———> then make nice again ————-> then tease her right after.
That way you’ll develop a patter that she’ll adapt, and she ‘ll start teasing you, as a puppy throws a ball at you so you can play with her.
Clear ? Bet so
Value and priceless ancient knowledge delivered ? check
Useful ?  You bet. Go ahead and use this tonight and everyday.
Practice the teasing and the patterns,
Send an email reporting the good stuff. I want details man.
Cheers to you
Talk Soon


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Want To Date Hotter Women? STOP Doing this Now, Right Now.

By Dan Santiago.

What is up with this incredible day,
Am I the only here who thinks this air is awesome ?
1I though so.
It’s fascinating.
Air is food man. So if you want to succeed, open the windows of your house, make sure that the air in your place, workplace or wherever you are is clean.
It’s got to be clean air.
Enjoy  it, put attention to it, because besides being key to our survival<——— small reminder . . .


Doesn’t cost a thing, you don’t cut the chances of your fellow neighbor to get his if you breathe furiously. We are not running out of it.
And it lets you connect to the moment.
Air is abundant,
As money, pussy, adventures, and men who haven’t already open their eyes. Poor bastards.
But we, we are cruising here.
Becoming the dynamic, powerful, sexy and dominant men we were meant to be.
Air is one of the NEEDS you have in life.
One cannot live without air to breathe.
Food is another NEED,
Water also.
And shelter.
But that’s about it.
Right there above are written your NEEDS for you to populate this planet. Or any planet.
In any environment, any climate, any continent.
You could go to Siberia, The Amazon rainforest, Sahara desert, Vitacura Chile.
If you can get food to eat, safe place to crash, water to drink.
And That’s it.
All the rest is bullshit.
Of course we “need to work” to pay our bills, rent or mortgage, electricity, phone bills, internet …
Of course. But those are gravy that makes this part of mankind’s  history so awesome,


You don’t really need none of those to LIVE, to exist.
And neediness, at some point is not just an attitude, it becomes a mindset.
And it’s a mindset that has a 70 billion dollar industry behind it.
Every where you go, they will pitch you that you need something.
You need the next iPhone, the next Macbook air, that other gadget, or that perfume, that flu shot.
All Bullshit.
Untitled design(20)But in your head – if you are voluntarily exposed to those messages, as in watching too much TV – you begin to absorb that. And that neediness, later on starts to create another mindset, which is hard to eradicate – lacking.
Because lacking is going to require more needs to fill its void. The more sense of lacking you have, the more needy you will be.
If you haven’s slept with anyone on a while, you will feel that lacking, and it will communicate neediness on every interaction you have with women.
Tv, movies, will always preach it.
To make it so ingrained in your bones, that you do everything they tell you to do.
You become part of their game, part of the flock of sheep out there.
And by doing that you compromise your purpose, your vision, your mission.
You become part of their plan.
Instead of YOUR plan.
And guess what they have planned for you ?
Not much.
Life is abundant in air, is abundant in food, is abundant in opportunities, pussy, money.
You have to be open and aware to make that abundance yours.
Life’s like an ocean, immense, vast, abundant.
So make sure when you are at the beach at least show up with a bucket, instead of a teaspoon.
Besides all the formerly listed, you needs are all covered. They are all being taken care of.

By Yourself

Because you have all it takes to have an amazing life.
You have within you all the power to make this trip a story for youngsters to remember, to happily remember that badass who did it his own way.
Inside yourself you have everything you may ever need.
1_bikini_fourbeauties_wide_1a7d9fd-1a7d9ftYou don’t need fame, money, trucks loads of women …
Wait but I want all that  … or course man I want that too, and you and me here, we’ll get all that …
But we don’t NEED it.
We are all that we are, WITH that or WITHOUT that. BEFORE and AFTER.
You may want a pair of Bugattis and a 2.3 Million house in LA, and it doesn’t mean you cannot get them.
Doesn’t mean you can’t have a great vision, and work hard for it to come to fruition,
It means you don’t need them.
It’s absolutely critical that you make that difference between wanting something and needing something
Obsessing about something – your success, your business, your purpose.
Totally different animal
But the media always tells you need things, and the neediness state is a powerless state, you are giving all your power to something, someone,  concept or idea.


And the fact that up until now you behaved like you needed someone, or needed outcomes in your life …  You pushed them all away.
You did, because of your neediness.
So stop it right now. You are all that you ever need, so love yourself as if your life depended on it. And it does.
You may want the hot blonde in the counter, but you don’t need her.
And if you want her, approach her.
7Don’t give her your whole body language, that communicates neediness. Same when interrupting her in the middle of conversation.
Your vocal delivery must be after you have listened – and by that, being present in the moment – and process that info. Only that way you can come back with a phrase that is either funny, a challenge, a sexual remark, or a tension generator.
All wins when it comes to women. And you are a winner. You want to succeed.
When you make a remark on something, and this woman appears offended … never apologize or back pedal. That’s sub communicating that you need her approval or rapport.
And it can be that you offended her. But 99% of the times will be a shit test.
Although in some women might work later on,  instead of offenses ( offenses, negging and all that shit will only get you crazy chicks ) go around planting seeds of challenge, great emotional experience like stories with laughs, sex, tender moments, exhilarating stories, sexual tension, or teach ‘em something …

And NEVER Apologyze

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3 Outrageous & Untold Secrets Of Female Sexuality

I know alreadyAwesome day today.  Perfect to talk about female sexuality, one of my favs.
Air is getting HOT, spring down here has claimed its place in the scene.
Claimed … a state that a woman loves to feel with her man.
And today we are going to talk about the subject what women love to talk the most
I mean, we are NOT going to talk about how give her the most incredible orgasm she has ever experienced.
She will have incredible Orgasms once you start to put into practice these three secrets, that media, your parents, your teachers, and even your friends have mislead you to believe.
Not that they did it on purpose.
It’s just that regular people – i.e. Not US – have followed for generations without questioning.
Secrets that have been kept like that for centuries and only about 1-5% of men is acquainted with.
And It’s meant to be kept that way.

Same as Money. – Did you know that if all the money in the world would be gathered and split fairly among all the people on earth more sooner than later would end up in the same hands ?


These secrets have been kept like that so the whole bunch of regulars wouldn’t feel so undervalued.
What a shame isn’t it …
F*ck No
They don’t have the balls and will to wake up and see for themselves.
They are to busy watching lame ass TV, wasting time on social media or paying for porn or sex.
Their fault
Before I reveal that to you, these 3 secrets that will change the way you see women …
I want to give a big Shout out to the guys who are already inside The Alpha Man Lair
Some big journey awaits for You, full of Charm, Charisma and soaking wet Brazilian waxed p*ssy.
We are going to be talking about . . .


Yes we areAnd Let me tell you quick story that will prove my rant . . .my manifesto about female sexuality.
The other day I went to the shopping center to get a gift to my 7 year old niece …
I arrived 5 minutes before the building closes, as I usually do when I visit places I simply don’t like.
Like Shopping centers
Being there I approached this girl at the information counter
Me: Hi, can you tell me where I can find a toy store – Before I said that, as I was approaching, a piercing deep look in her eyes, a powerful glance, an I-would-fuck-you-in-this-very-counter kind of eye contact is what I did, and what I do every time I approach a hot girl . . .
Girl at the information desk: a Toy store … for kids ? <——- this is so easy, not fair
Me : Do they have adults toys for sale in this place ? <——- sexual innuendo, as a default response by now, and with a glance that if would make a sound it’d be like “ you horny puppy”
Girl : No they don’t … unluckily <——- She just openly dismissed my initial request and went for the sex chatter immediately.
Having said that, she looked down – accessing her emotional brain –
Her partner – a dude – at the desk laughs.
If I were alone with her I could’ve continued the conversation about sex toys, and blatantly tell her what I’d do to her.
But I listened to her directions on how to get to the store – for kids –
As she is saying this to me, I gently touch her hand, and keep it there all the time she points the directions.
I said goodbye.
Went to get the present.
Then 30’ later I came back. She’s already warmed up.
Few laughs
More sexual toys innuendos
3 hours later she’s sound sleep, properly fucked and satisfied
That’s right.
Women talk sex all the time. They love to talk sex.
Is their favorite subject, they spend most of their day time fantasizing about sex and talking with their friends about it.


They want it in the pussy, the ass, their mouths, the belly button, the ears, you name it.
They have 10 times the pleasure out of sex than men do.
It can last 10 times longer.
You want more proof ? see for your self
And when a High Value male brings up the subject around them they just flock, giggle, fantasize and get wet.
I've always liked that colorJust Remember the last time you were around a group of people, and somebody – if not yourself – brought up the subject, of sex. Or somebody made a joke or a sexual remark …
I bet their eyes instantly sparked attention, and if the subject was introduced by a man assured of himself – as you are – that attention quickly turned to attraction, then lust then banging ——> easy equation.
In fact every time the subject is brought up and  moved to higher levels, there is usually a male – a poor sucker – that tries to change the subject to something else. Those suckers can’t handle the sexual tension.
And even tries to bring to shame to the one person who brought the subject.
That’s why people don’t get laid.
They just miss the whole point.
Sex is fun, natural and common.
No biggie.
And now you know.
Every time you want to get laid, talk about sex.
With no outcomes in mind.
In fact, talk about it and then change the subject to something else.
Like it’s not a big deal
And it isn’t.
Because although women are the only creature that walks the earth that has an anatomical structure which its sole purpose is sexual satisfaction – the clitoris – their main erogenous zone is:
Drum roll …


Their imagination, that is what turns them on the most. The brain, the imagination is the drive behind female sexuality.
Let's Make It 51 shadesAsk E.L. James.
50 shade of Gray … 125 million copies sold in 52 languages,  sounds familiar ?
Quick recap.
Women Love to fuck.
Women’s favorite conversation subject is sex.
If you want to get laid, talk about sex.
And then do it with them.
But beware,
If you get turned on by the conversation and start to switch to lone horny wolf mode, you’ll kill the whole vibe.
You have to speak and act like it’s not a big deal.
And it really isn’t.
Now you know better.

Yet you better keep on learning…


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Are You F*cking Your Dream Woman By Now ? If Not It May Be Because Of This

By Dan Santiago

kiteIf there is one thing I enjoy and day dream most of the is being outside,
Playing sports,
Sliding down the woman mountain. Bathing in salty waters. Whatever activity that makes me feel pumped up and alive.
You know what else does it for me ?
Learning. Reading the books. Investing in myself.  Which EVERYBODY should do.
Doing shit. Approaching that hottie at the supermarket, make her giggle, open to my touch.
Playing the GAME, make her chase me. And Finally,

Own Her

Giving Away My Gifts.
As A Man.
To women, to Life.
An important part of being a man is having purpose and direction.
But a man cannot quit on his hunger to acquire more skills, knowledge, abilities.
A Man cannot excel in life if he’s not willing to commit himself to upgrade his skills in any area that he might be involved.
So if you are one of those who have many things in your life that you are interested in, kudos.
Means you have a chance on many aspects in Life.
The downside ?
aussie-beach-babes-016-3That you are going to be required to master each one of those crafts. Otherwise they are just going to become heavy burdens and distractions for you.
Doc, does that mean I have to choose ? Not necessarily, the choice you have already made it. Way before landing on this web page.
But choices have their consequences, having too many activities that you are involved in, will have their toll on your time for your kids, partner, other activities.
There are SACRIFICES that need to be made. By you, for you.
If you want Mastery in any area of life you have to be actively performing the activity for at least 10,000 hours.
If you are obsessed about that guitar, the only way you are going to get better is USING it, PRACTICING.

What you don’t use, you loose.

Guitar playing may NEVER be a profitable activity for you – money wise – but it’s an activity that builds you as a man, it increases your value, and it’s worth your time.
It can be guitar, drum, surf, ski, whatever.
Approaching with confidence to a hottie at the shopping mall, and start a 10 minutes conversation and getting her phone number, is not an activity that will make you much money. But it’s absolutely essential for you to finally attract the woman of your dreams.
Or the series of women you want for yourself.
You don’t have to bed them the same night, and if you do, congrats.
But that’s not the point.
Practicing, developing skills is an absolute must for any man who wants to have and enjoy an outstanding experience on this planet.
Because that hottie that woman that occupies your head. She’s not going to be available for you if you don’t put yourself on the spot and be vulnerable and take your chance.
And If she’s really, really amazing as I am imagining she would be, you are not going to have the balls to approach her, on sight. and be succesful. No way.

You Practice.

Practicing allows you to work on your weaknesses, become aware of where exactly you are f*cking up, know where you are succeeding and keep on hammering with that.
When to change subjects, when to leave, how to know if she’s a psycho, how to know if you would want to give this one some 12 weeks of your time.
Guitar plating, GAME, seducing women, skiing, anything that you want to MASTER, will require great amounts of effort and practice.
There not a pill for that.
It all comes down to hitting/kicking/throwing/catching that ball.
As many times as you need to.
For as long as it is required to.
Of course you can have guidance.
A guitar teacher, a coach, a mentor.
But all of them can only show you the way.
You are the one who has to go through the door.
Practice not until you get it right, but until you can't get it wrong,And you do that with long, persistent, disciplined hours of practice.
You don’t have to invite her drinks <——— don’t do it. Why would you ?
You don’t need to spend money. Just  FOCUS on practice.
Go there to a bar, have a chat with 10 women that night. Approach, confidently, make a remark or comment about something that is happening at the moment <———-avoid questions,  and start practicing.
Make your MINDSET about practice.
As many times It takes. And you keep doing it, not until you do it right.
Leave that to the sea of mediocrity out there.

You practice until you can’t do it wrong.

And then Doc ?
Well you keep practicing, damn it !
What you don’t use you LOSE
And It is also absolutely IMPERATIVE to KEEP UPGRADING your skills.
Push that fucking threshold of abilities you have.
Simply become better at everything you do.
Invest in yourself, read these newsletters over and over.
Have that skull tattooed with this information.
With this state of the art information.
With the latest information.
Get that guitar teacher,  that coach.
A Mentor.
And put yourself out there, out there practicing.
Gaming those MILF’s, gaming those college cuties that are so desperate to feel a real man.
Sometimes you need to crawl to practicePractice, Practice, Practice.
Never stop. Sorry to disappoint you, but you can never stop.
You can’t stop Life, you can’t stop practicing.
That way, whenever you see a woman you like, you can approach at ease, relaxed, confident.
You will have done that a 1,000 or 10,000 times. And make her yours on a whim.
Because of your practice.  Your persistence.
As a result you learned. And you kept on it.
Because you upgraded your skills. As a result of constant practice.
That way, whatever thing which a while ago seemed f*cking impossible, you can master now with ease.
And Trust yourself in the process.
It is a process.
Always remember that.

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3 Ways To Unleash Your Inner Rockstar

img_55303Man I ‘m so pumped up on Life, I can’t  think straight.
I’m having an incredible time so I’ll just keep on writing in this mood.
Because when you are in an incredible mood,
And you share … stories, yourself or your presence, words, jokes, whatever …
Everybody gets pumped up.
It’s contagious
It travels fast.
Lighting fast man
Either that,
or that Green Juice w/
Drum roll


Man that root is
Maybe it was  that whole coctel in that green juice.
I don’t know …
Because I was pretty pumped up before that green juice,
But Ginger is amazing man
Boosts your immune system,
Protects you against cancer,
green-juiceHas Anti inflammatory properties,
Protects your gut flora – your second brain, and usually the wiser –
And adds that incredible kick to your juice that just
Knocks it

Out Off The Park

Man, I got to put some Vodka in there sometime, lol.
Ooh, you need to add a quarter of a lemon too.
And that’s Perfection.
The other day I had the privilege on running to, not one, but
Rock stars, the real kind. The ones that play music.
Some people may act like Rockstars … almost everybody wants to be like a Rockstar …
Actors, Soccer Players, Football Players, Socialites, TV people.
Almost everybody “famous” wants to portray a Rockstar image.
Mr. Duff McKagan. If you don’t know who he is, you’ve been living under a rock for the past 30 years.
And Mr. Josh Homme. And I’m gonna throw some help here,  although he’s by far a legend by now, like the aforementioned McKagan.
Homme is the leader, guitarist, singer and composer of the band Queens Of The Stone Age. He also has several other side projects, like Them Crooked Vultures, and so on.
Dudes were coming from Rock in Rio. They weren’t traveling together.
Like any other regular folk, they were in the line up, waiting to enter to the US at the customs of Miami airport.
I asked each one of them for a picture and they kindly accepted.
It was 4 30 in the morning, we all looked like shit after more than 8 hours flying. Homme joked/complained a little about that, although he immediately posed with your friend here.
McKagan just said: sure!
stevierachellemetalsludge1Rockstars have such a charisma and magnetism,
That make women wet.
And men to admire them.
You see a Rockstar, a real one, and you have heard all his stories.
Like if you knew them all along.
You have an archive, an image of them in your brain.
After all,
Music, as a perfectly mathematical expression of sounds,

Touches your soul

And, do you know what is the Quintessential trait of a Rockstar, and why everybody wants to BE ONE?
Second drum roll …
FVck this should be a drum solo.
Because …
They Don’t Give a f*ck
NO f*cks given.
At all.
That is the reason why everything else is possible.
The women,
The admiration,
The money,
The fame,
You name it.
The absolute absence of external reference, that does the whole thing.
But that non neediness has an origin, a birthplace.
If you are thinking about overnight success,
History has plenty of them.
I completely disagree with people who plainly say that success has to come through hard work ONLY.
Of course working your ass off is important for success, but,
I say they say that because deep inside they wish they were luckier before. At least at some point.
Back and forth there’s plenty of people who’ve had a split of a second “success” in whatever area in Life.
And they were, well … successful.
For a short period of time at least, they were.
They probably made some money too.
But the faster they ascend, and the higher they climb,
Leaves them in a place of turmoil.

Because they made it huge.

And remaining on that place that some of them – miraculously – got,
Being that career, business, personal, etc can … well …harm you.
Or in the more extreme circumstances, kill you.
Some people even do that themselves.
Nature’s way to even the score.
To keep around the ones who are worthy…
One of Man’s greatest fears, is the fear of speaking in public.
The fear of having to address a group of people.
Back in the cave days, if you were to address your tribe, and you encountered massive disapproval, that could’ve meant getting your head chopped off.
No es weveo
So it’s easy to get paralyzed sometimes when addressing a bunch of people.
Being on the spot light.
Taking the stage.
img_5492-copyBut then, again, you have Rockstars.
That every time they take the stage, they meet F*CKTONS of Positive Energy, of massive adoration, of massive desire from women in the crowd.
20- 40 – 60 thousand souls screaming your name. Cheering what you do as your passion.
Cheering what you set your life to be made of.

You are in THE ZONE

and then BOOOOOOM
Cheers of JOY
Every 5 minutes, when you hit the final note.
During 90-120 minutes.
Every time you do it.
What do you do with such immense amounts of energy?
How do you deal with that?
How you recycle that in your body and avoid losing your mind?
Well, with shit loads of alcohol, drugs and sex, some would say.
A shotgun to your head, would be some other people’s solution.
OD, can do it too.
Getting to that height, to that level of success, of fans screaming your name in devotion is not for the weak of character.
Neither for the faint of heart.
It has to be a person that just doesn’t give a fuck.
A kind of person who CAN do that, and survive the cost.
But the ZERO fucks given, by Rockstars, and anyone one who SURVIVE the turmoil of money and fame once they reach the top, is …


McKagan has been around for three decades plus.
A, once you see him, regular man who’s just in love with music.
Because he’s carrying his own instrument on his back.
He has accumulated shit tons of money,
Regular passive and massive income always coming to his check account.
Every day of his life.
Until the day he dies.
And so do his grand children, as the right of his music’s royalties are inheritable.
Has fucked trucks loaded with women.
A sought after musician by every rock band.
He has never needed anything.
But to only focus in his Purpose.
The joy, passion, determination and discipline to follow his true heart’s desire.
group-600x400The only one trait in a Human being that can tackle, or at least resist The Ultimate test of success, fame and fortune is Purpose.
Well, and its sidekicks …
Determination, because you cannot embrace  your true heart’s wishes if you’re not willing to make that jump.
To take that Plunge.
That leap of faith.
Joy, because you have to LOVE what you do in order to inspire others, or attract others who will partner up with you in your Life’s journey.
A blind Faith in yourself and in your gifts,

And Discipline.

Because there are overnight successes, but they are rare.
Never said they were the rule.
I said that they exist.
But their existence is brief.
Because they lack in some department.
And if they lack any bit in any of the traits previously discussed,
They are washed off shore by the tidal wave of pressure, lack of focus, and procrastination.
And there’s no other way to endure the test of Time.
Are you ready to be a Rockstar ?


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Always Do This When Approaching Women

When you see a woman chick that catches your attention…. and she makes you even turn around and distracts you from being that amazing and dynamic, purposeful man – that bitch – and, you don’t know her, but she indeed caught your glance…
You have to approach her.
It is not that you have to …
But you HAVE to.
Why ? you already know that

Attraction is NOT a Choice

and whenever that spark ignites, it’s the man who has to do the approaching. She won’t.
Don’t think about it, just go with your flow.
To comply with YOUR impulse.
And if your flow is shouting out loud ——> pussy !, pussy !, don’t deny it.
Never neglect your desire. Except if you are driving of course.
In Social Circle seduction, that might not be the case – because you have already met the women there, it’s not “cold approach” – barriers have been torn down.
It’s easier.
1280px-Approaching_OmahaBut when you don’t know the chick, you got no other choice, but to approach.
Even when she’s with friends. That’s even bolder, and easier
And when you finally speak to her, as she doesn’t know you there are very good chances that she will test you.
Challenge you.
Women do this when they are attracted to a man. It’s a survival mechanism to filter the unworthy.
So, when you approach her, she WILL test you.
She does that, because:
1.- She’s already attracted to you … but Doc, how ? if she doesn’t know me how can she be attracted to me … Well, because you are one of my readers, obviously, but there’s another reason for that too, that I’ll let you know in a sec.
2.- She needs to make sure you’d do it for her. That you are the kind of man she would be willing to invest time with.
I’ll tell you exactly how to pass that test in a minute, but first lets deconstruct the best approach for you.
Cold approaches aren’t 100% effective but they are a must for every man who wants to upgrade his skills with women.
They are the signature of a playfully dynamic, fearless, bold man.
And that’s why you are here to become.
Chances are that you may or may not meet women that you will do it for you in your social circle, so “cold approaches” has to be a tool that you can rely on.
Saturday-Night-Fever-DI-1First. Mindset.
You are already out. So let’s not forget that we go out to HAVE FUN. Never forget that.
Yes you might have gone out because some friends invite you and you were getting bored to death at your place, but the point is you go out to HAVE fun, otherwise you will put too much pressure on yourself and fuck this up very fast.
You may have some drinks, smoke a little this or a little that, but you go out to —-> HAVE FUN. <—-even though all that sounds great, you won’t succeed approaching hot girls if you are drunk, or stoned.
In order to succeed on this you have to practice, practice and practice. But it’s imperative – as in any proper practice – that you practice your successes ———> and to be a success in this you have to BE present in the moment, a thing that weed – despite all great things it may have – doesn’t allow you to.
And Alcohol it may loose you up, but it’s usual that if you don’t get results immediately, you may start to have more drinks, for many reasons.
Guys do this all the time. They get “rejected” and they try to drown the moment in a drink, or they think that one more drink will give them the courage to approach.
That’ll only get you frustrated, drunk and jerking off later on.
Second. Body Language.
You have to make eye contact FIRST. If she doesn’t see you, you don’t stand a chance. I mean, you can pull it, yet its better if you do make eye contact, the way I’m going to explain to you in a minute…
quickfixes_1After you make eye contact, the way we discussed in The Alpha Man Lair, you approach her IMMEDIATELY, do not wait. Do not go to the bar to get another drink or to get a drink if you don’t already have one in your hand. Do not elbow your buddy to show him the chick that caught your eye.
All that talk and unnecessary waiting for the approach is extremely damaging for your results:
1.- Because you start to rationalize the moment. Your INSTINCT caught your attention by this chick.  Not your reason or logic. If you wait and don’t pursue, besides rationalizing – which is useless – you will put pressure on yourself, and the more you delay, the harder it will get. And she will see right through you. DON’T DELAY THE APPROACH.
2.- That’s precisely the practice – or one of the most important parts that you need to practice. The immediate approach. Practice YOUR IMMEDIATE response. Until it becomes second nature.
Make it a reflex.

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